So for this blog I am going to be talking about my family vacation I took over this past weekend during the Thanksgiving holidays. I am going to be talking about one thing in particular that pissed me off on this trip.
I spent a very fun and memorable 2 days at Disney World; 1 day at magic kingdom and the 2nd day at Epcot Center. I have not been to either of these places since I was 8 or 10 I think so about 20 years. This was however, my niece’s 6th or 7th trip to DISNEY at 6 and ½ years old. Keep in mind she did not go until she was 4 and could walk most of time. The fact that I have not been there in so long led me to spend a lot of time reminiscing and trying to remember how much had changed since I was last there, how different things seemed as an adult than what it did as a child 2 decades ago.
One the thing that was still there was babies….lots of them. I understand parents wanting to take their kids to Disney world, but who would not at least once…if I were to actually want kids of my own I would for sure take them. I wish I could take my dog though, but unrealistic as hell. However, as I walked along in both parks I was constantly dodging strollers filled with sleeping kids, loud kids, crying kids or no kids but lots of bags. Maybe less in Epcot center since it’s not a park really young kids would enjoy….hell when I was 8 I remember being bored to death with much of it.
Nevertheless, my point is that were shit tons of toddlers and shit tons of babies…shit tons.
It’s ironic because as I’m writing this in a terminal at Orlando international airport someone’s screaming baby is having a crying tantrum fit and the amazing and loving parents are doing nothing to stop it but just smiling at the people like me giving them shitty looks (Insert sarcastic tone here)
Tell me parents? What purpose does it serve to bring a newborn baby to a place like Disney world? What is the point of bringing a kid who cannot walk yet to that magical place? I mean seriously it’s not like you don’t have grandparents or a relative who you can have take care of the kid for a few days or week that you will be gone. Even your kids that are as old as 3 and maybe 4. It is not like your six-month-old baby or 2 or 3 year old kids is going to enjoy it in the same way a 8 or 10 year old would. It is not like your baby that is less than a year old or kid that is 3 is even going to fucking remember anything from your trip to Disney World.
As I walked through the park, it blew my mind at the inappropriateness of bringing kids this young to a park like that. It is hot, your day is long, and you have a poor little baby-sitting in a stroller crying all day because its hot and you parents to a large degree think it’s ok.
What rides can you go on with your 6-month-old baby…Big Thunder Mountain? Space Mountain? The Tea-cup ride?????Anything that moves fast or even at a faster pace…nope you cannot. SO what? Are you going to go on “it’s a small word” and “Winnie the poo” over and over again…really!!!! Cuz that sounds like a waste of hundreds or thousands of dollars.
You just walk around waving your parent flag taking up an entire fucking isle in a gift shop with your stupid fucking side-by-side doublewide “I got this to be inconvenient to the world” stroller. Or they take up far too much room down the paths around the park, sticking your stroller our wherever you want. Pissed because people will not move and get out of your way because you decided to breed and bring your kid to Disney World where IT is entirely too young to be there.
If you are at Epcot do, you really think the countries and science stuff they have there is really that fucking interesting to a damn 6-month-old BABY or 3 year old even a 4 year old. Do you really think your baby or 3 three year old knows where Germany is, what a beer stein is or what French perfume smells like or what Moroccan food tastes like? They do not…not one bit and will not remember seeing any of it. Why would ANY sane parent even think about bringing a baby to Disney!!!!!!!!!!
DO you really thing the firework displays will do nothing but scare the shit out of your baby or 2 or 3 year old…If you don’t you’re a moron.
My feeling is if your kid or kids cannot walk through one of parks at Disney World on their own a majority of the time than your kids should not be there. For the many people like me who go there without little little kids we think that you are nothing but a pain in the ass. I damn near broke a guys jaw because he ran over my niece (who walked through both parks for 10-12 hours on her own feet the whole time) because she was in his stupid strollers way with his sleeping kids. I hate how entitled some parents think they are because they had kids and have their kid’s strollers at these parks or others like them.
I hated having to constantly dodge around your these stupid strollers or getting stuck behind them because the parents were walking to slow. If your kid is not old enough to speak in coherent phrases, walk on their own without being carried 80% of the time you should not be bringing your kids to Disney World. I get that this is a place for families but what is the point when people in your family will not even remember going there and are not smart enough to understand if they will enjoy it or not.
Wait until your kids are 5 or 6 or older that is reasonable I think. At that age, they WILL remember being there and WILL enjoy most of it if not all of it I think. Epcot is a little different I think kids younger than 8 should not go…I just don’t think they would find it that interesting but it could depend on how smart your kid is. However, a literal baby being there is stupid, I saw more than few mothers and fathers at the Magic Kingdom with babies that were LESS than 6 months old…this is just fucking insane. Find a fucking baby sitter or dog sitter or do not go. Better yet one parent should stay at the hotel with the baby if they have other kids…but do not go and be a pain in the ass while you are there.
I am sure next time I go to Disney World nothing will changes and I will walk around constantly annoyed and inconvenienced by you stupid parents and your dumb little kids that are too young to be there. One thing I realized as I walked around the park is that things like that never change.
Maybe Disney should have something like 2 days a week where babies and kids in strollers are not allowed….Just 2…hell I might settle for 1.
Side note – This complaint of mine DOES NOT include handicapped or physically impaired children of any age. These kids deserve the memories just as much as kids or people that are not physically impaired.